What Happened to My Sense of Wonder?

A bonus "I Wonder" Column by Guest Writer Janice Walton

Photo by Kristina Flour on Unsplash

This week’s bonus post was written by Guest Columnist Janice Walton.

When asked to write an article about something I wondered about, my first thought was, “But I don’t wonder.” That and curiosity never had a chance.

When I was growing up in the 1940s, my parents had four basic rules.

Don’t ask questions

Don’t talk back

Children were to be seen and not heard

Do as you’re told

You can’t be curious or wonder when you can’t ask questions. That door was closed.

Experts explain that curiosity is a quest to bridge the gap between what we know and what we don't know. They also say that wonder is the ability to move between knowing and not knowing with attentive, focused awareness and without judgment.

Those early house rules affected my choices for years. Only recently have I become comfortable asking questions and being curious.

So why not open the door to wondering? Am I too late?

What I’ve Learned:

I found three definitions when I looked up the word in the dictionary.

Thinking or speculating - like wondering about the solar system's origin.

Filled with admiration, amazement, or awe - wondering at someone’s composure during a crisis.

Doubting - wondering if I could write this article.

Several factors impact childhood wonder and curiosity like increased exposure to technology and structured activities, social pressures to conform, a lack of time spent in nature, discouragement from adults who may dismiss questions or limit exploration, and a shift in focus towards achievement and results rather than the joy of discovery.

When children start school, their spontaneous questions seem to slow down, and many lose their curiosity in adulthood. They’re taught to assume it's better not to ask questions.

Then, I wondered how I might revive my sense of wonder. The internet had a lot to say, for example.

One site said that to revive a sense of wonder, people can seek new experiences, perspectives, and details in everyday life: explore new places, slow down to appreciate the small things, look at familiar things from a different angle, ask questions, and learn about new topics.

Another site suggested listening to others, trying a new hobby, visiting new places, and meeting people with different ideas from our own.

Experts say older adults can positively impact emotional well-being, foster a deeper connection to the outer world, and counteract feelings of isolation or decline associated with aging by going on “awe walks.” This involves actively noticing and appreciating the beauty and complexity of the surroundings.

So, it’s not too late to revive wonder; it might even help people age well. Writing this article opened the door for me - now it’s part of my vocabulary. I wonder if it will work for you, too.

Janice Walton is a psychologist, widow, mother, grandmother, great-grandmother, and writer. Her book Aging Well: 30 Lessons for Making the Most of Your Later Years is available on Amazon, and she writes articles for SubStack.